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DEALING WIH OFFENCES

 



 HH, Patriarch Sir Johnson

Beloved Family,

Few things damage spiritual communities more than unresolved offence. Someone says something careless, a misunderstanding occurs, expectations are not met, and suddenly there is distance, tension, and cold shoulders. If left unaddressed, these small offences calcify into bitterness and division.

I want to speak directly to you today about handling offence in a way that protects both your heart and our community. First, understand that you will be offended. As long as imperfect people interact, offence is inevitable. The question is not whether you will experience offence but how you will handle it.

When offence comes, you have a choice. You can rehearse it repeatedly in your mind, build a case against the offender, gather sympathizers to your side, and allow bitterness to take root. This path leads to spiritual poison and relational death. Or you can address it quickly, directly, and humbly.

Most offences are based on misunderstanding rather than malicious intent. What you perceived as deliberate slight may have been thoughtlessness. What felt like rejection may have been a distraction. What seemed like disrespect may have been different communication styles colliding. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Assume good intentions until proven otherwise.

If the offence persists, follow the biblical model: go directly to the person. Not to others about the person—to the person. State what happened, how it affected you, and ask for clarity. Most conflicts can be resolved in this single conversation if both parties approach it with humility and openness.

Some of you hold offences from years ago, nursing wounds that should have healed long ago. This is not protecting yourself; it is poisoning yourself. Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Release them. Not because they deserve it, but because you deserve freedom.

Choose today to live offence-free. When a wrong occurs, address it quickly. When you cannot resolve it, release it anyway. Do not allow another person's poor behaviour to create bitterness in your heart.

In reconciliation, 

Patriarch Johnson

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